Experience

Well, i'm turning 21 in two months. However this amazing number comes with responsibility .

So talking about responsibility is very very dull. You're young, enjoy life and explore all the things you had never explore before. Try meeting new people from all over the world and gain more experience. 

At the age of 20, I have experienced things which changed me. For instance :- 

2016 , January. 

I've realized that I've become heartless that I decided to shut my feelings down and avoid any serious commitment just because I was afraid of getting hurt, being betrayed and being left alone. I mean, I love spending time on my own. Sitting at Starbucks, by the side of the window and start writing down on my journal or my all time fav place would be in McDonald. I would simply sit by the window and look at various types of people, couples, students and corporate people having their lunch and many more. I enjoyed my time being on my own which at that point of time I was not aware of my problems. I was heartless towards everyone. I could not care less if I were to hurt them with my action, all I cared was being on my own.
Well, this are the side effect of  being hurt and betrayed by those whom i trusted with all my heart. These kind of heartbreaks can really change people. It changed me indeed, for the rest of my life I would always remember the pain I felt, the tears I shed for the stupidest reason, the time where I fallen on my knee and cried and at that point of time, I felt my heart crashing and I was never the same. 

2016, March

Well, I can't say much but all I can say is that I had seen more than anyone would imagine. I've have faced many harsh judgement, comments that some days, I would just sit and cried my lungs out. I begun having a kind of anxiety which was a " Panic Attack". Which was most probably the worst kind of sickness anyone could have. You can't breath, you can't even eat without vomiting, at a point I could barely open my eyes. I just shut myself. That was the scariest kind of sickness I could had ever experienced. I am used to people looking down on me just because of my outer look. I am used to people looking down at me just because I am not as perfect as they assume they are. To simplified my point , People are the most scariest thing a person could ever face. They could destroy a person in seconds and even minutes. I had the worst experience facing many rejections, criticism and people judgement that I had almost lost myself.

2016. May 

After what I had gone through, I was given an amazing chance to start over. I had found the Department of Museum. The corporate communication department. It was the best experience. After what happened. It was a brand new start. It was sad because, the industrial training lasted for only 3 months. But I enjoyed every each second I was there. We were even praised by the Director of Department of Museums Malaysia. I spend  most of day there saying hi hello to everyone, everyone treated me as part of their family. Everyone was far older than I was, but they took a real good care of me. I was happy that I was given a brand new start. The memories I created, the places I visited, the people I meet and talked to.  I enjoyed the road trip with the special vehicle , I feel like a VIP going to putrajaya. Participated with the UNESCO celebration , the best event was at the Tourism Center, Saloma Bistro. The memory last even until now. 

2016. September

I started working at Breakout. I had officially graduated. I am now an official Diploma holder. I've searched high and low for a job however Breakout was the first to offer. I dealt with more people. With different attitude. It was indeed another challenging experience. I've seen the best and the worst of people. How they react, their body language speaks louder than words. I've read them all. There was some good days, there are of course some bad days. The most thing I missed was the people, because they made me feel accepted. Even when I am so different, the made me feel like apart of them. They met my special someone, they made my special one feel welcomed. They accept me even when I am an alien. They are the best kind of people,. I miss those moments where we sat on the floor and talk and played "spin the bottle" "truth and truth". Dance and sing in the middle of the shop and enjoyed their youth to the max, 

2016. October

I was again given a bright hope, I was offered to work with another group of loving people. MEX Department. They are all like my big sister and brothers. The treated me as their own little siblings. They made me laugh and feel welcomed. I am happy to be where I am. It has its up and down. But i am here to learn and gain more experience. 

Well, that pretty much sums the whole idea of my previous and current experience. I truly hope that, I am able to learn more and improve myself. Because I am at the age of exposure. I am about to face a more scarier reality than it already is. If I can pull myself through every single fight, why can't you? All you need to have is believe and faith. 

#Pardon if my English aren't as perfect as others, I may hold a diploma in English but I am a human being whom is still  learning and in the process of improving myself. Thank you

Sado,